hold the phone

I feel like every generation always complains about younger generation getting lazier and being "the downfall of society". Although I think this is a bit dramatic and that society is just evolving like it always does, I have began to question the sanity of the nation and frankly the world due to one ridiculously lazy product. Readers, I present the snuggie. Usually, I am a huge fan of awful commercials promoting needless products but this is too much. Really? Is it that hard to hold a remote while you're laying down on the couch? Is it really all that difficult to move your hand from under your blanket to shove more pop corn in your mouth? I will give a slight pass to the elderly because I can imagine knitting would be frustrating if you're confined to a location and constantly cold but even then one could wear a sweat shirt from a group vacation to see the flower beds of the north east with other seniors. Really no one anywhere has any excuse to wear a snuggie. The commercial is insulting insuating that we can possibly achieve moving from under our blanket. More importantly, can anyone but me see the snuggie? The actors all deserve acting awards today because they seemed convinced that the snuggie will end the world's problems. Their massive smiles suggest 2 suggestions. One, they grew up in some cult in Utah or Texas where they were banned from blankets or anything that provided warmth. Since they do not know any better they are over joyed with this amazing invention and therefore jubilant. Second, everyone in the commercial was kidnapped at birth and now live on an island with out mirrors or any materials that show reflections. Other than that if you have or wear a snuggie you're basically saying you have given up on yourself and the will to live. Your appearance says, "I need absolute total comfort in order to sit and watching television mindlessly. It does not matter that I look like I'm wearing a choir robe from the near by Pentecostal church, what matters most is that I am required to move as little as humanly possible". Not only are adults subjecting ourselves to this fashion horror, we are scarring the future leaders of tomorrow. Yes, the great folks and snuggies also have sizes for children of all ages...even babies. What's the big deal you ask? Well, if just seeing one isn't enough for you, ask yourself this...when will it end? Are we going to start using the jazzy because we don't want to move? Will people begin using adult diapers out of laziness? What next? For the safety of our nation and future generations we need to fix wall street and eliminate snuggies forever! Hopefully we will all look back at this scary snuggie time and thank our stars that we no longer have to deal with the grossest invention ever, but I guess that's all up to you. Please for your family, friends, and anyone with vision, never ever ever buy a snuggie.

I hope everyone enjoyed their weekend, snuggie free :) For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

colored jeans

Maybe my crazy Mamaw had it all down when she kept every garment of outdated and unfortunate fashion staples since 1965. Because of her dedication to "waste not - want not" she has numerous closets in their house stuffed full with bell bottoms, florescent shirts with huge shoulder pads and puff painted t-shirts and sweat shirts. Mamaw has thousands of shoes in every color and heal size imaginable. She also has a jewelry box that is the size of my bathroom dresser. Every box is crammed with jewelery from literally every fashion fad or mistake. Why do you ask am I applauding this hoarding behavior? Fashion repeats itself..that's why. Thousands, possibly millions of families spend their precious spring weather indoors enduring the wrath that is spring cleaning. We throw out everything. I am too guilty of this waste. "I haven't worn this is a year, it's gone." But look at my Mamaw. She kept every color of the popular ballet flats from 1983 and last year BAM they're totally HOT. Example 2. Colored jeans. Yes colored jeans are back with a vengeance! Every decade has it's blunders but the 80s and early 90s were truly tragic. The stone washed, tightly rolled, pleated tummy colored jeans were unflattering on literally every body type. The only bonus we have is that huge hair is not really in so at least our bodies will look somewhat proportional. Even a skinny girl in 1984 had no hope for a flattering facebook picture with the 8lbs of teased bangs (pictured left) and fire hazard hairspray that weighed everyone down and tested lung capacity in the shower while attempting to hold one's breath until all the hairspray was gone. (Ever see An Inconvenient Truth? on the deleted scenes, Gore talks about the bad effects of hairspray but since his southern roots are so deep and he didn't want to offend Tippa's early 90's style he left it out) Women in their tight rolled jeans, ballet flats and massive helmet hair carried the proud silhouette of broccoli (pictured right). I will admit that all of the recent pictures of these girls in colored jeans have much more of a flattering waist line with out the mom jean pleating of the past, but all the pictures show the perfect (and I like to think computer created) flattened tummy... so really a potato sack would work for them. What about the rest of America? Are we doomed to repeat the same tragic mistakes of the 80s? If we take our advice from the stars the answer would most certainly be yes. Recently countless stars have been slammed for the daring wardrobe decisions... all including 80s styles that did not work then and proven once again to be faulty. For example on the left is the usually adorable Katie Holmes. She has been noted in countless magazines as a fashion icon but BLECK... look at her in her rolled jeans! Are you kidding me? She's not the only one who has been a victim to the 80s comeback. Second...a couple of months ago it seemed the world had come to an end when Jessica Simpson wore some high wasted pants with too many belts. Although these jeans were not colored, they were high wasted and pleated and pretty terrible (pictured right). Two beautiful and talented women tricked and punished by the stylists who want to bring back the worst fashion decade ever. I guess the only thing we can learn from all of this is to actually be like Mamaw and never throw out any old clothes. At least that way we won't have to buy these awful clothes twice. Maybe this throw back to the 80s due to the economic crisis, maybe it is due to the fashion world running out of ideas, whatever the case, let's just hope it ends sooner than it started and if they must repeat a decade they will repeat the glamorous 1940s and it will be acceptable to wear sequins anytime of the day. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

Halo = Hell

Whoever invented video games must have hated the notion that men and women would like to spend time together talking. Obviously the constant groans, explosion sounds, and demanding hand coordination one is required to have when playing Halo eliminates any possibility from those around the game to engage in any conversation. With the rare exception of the male yelling out some sort of profanity or a grimacing groan as though they themselves have been hit by the computerized guns, the amount of words spoken during a game of Halo equals the amount of brain cells required to inhale...(got two of them to rub together?!) Anyway, I feel that women often get the raw end of the deal when it comes to the "stereotyping" of bad relationships. All the constant nagging, endless shopping trips, forced outings with friends in restaurants that have small portions and overpriced fruity drinks with umbrellas, low sugar diets, etc. etc. have all been subject for ridicule since the beginning of time for comedians, rednecks, and Seinfeld fans. I cannot count how many times a HBO or Comedy Central presentation comedian has bashed the quirky habits of women. BUT when do we ever hear about the men folk? You enjoy movies with out plots, words, or meanings but the more violence the better. Playing Halo with guys is considered a great night out and for some God known reason dogs are your best friend. Who wants a best friend who eats their own poop, drools constantly, and eats your shoes? If a friend did even one of these crimes I would bash them constantly and defriend them on facebook immediately. But men want to invite these beasts into their homes and even worse...their beds! With this last blog I'm now realizing that I should probably dump my heals and grab some Birkenstocks and become a raging feminist. As much as I groan I guess I enjoy the male sex, well mostly the gays. I hope everyone has a great weekend. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

signing off

Today I realized that I should quit my blog...I thought I might just take a vacation but now it's totally not worth it. The blog is not really doing it for my creatively anymore. I cannot be contained to the pressure of writing daily and need to be free to write where nobody is judging and reading and thinking that I am writing for others rather than for myself. I need an outlet that is totally selfish and healing to my soul. So here I am singing out for the last time. It's been a great ride. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

bwahaha April fools suckers! I hope everyone had fun with April's fools day. Not for the last time...for Natalie's News this has been, Natalie Corinne.

Sybil

So deep down there is a little secret voice that knows the future and knows everything will eventually turn out perfectly when I grow up. It may sound odd but it's my own little fortune cookie that reminds me of exactly what I need to hear. I repeatedly hear the future voice saying things like, "you look stunning in a bathing suit when you take your perfect, bilingual, adopted children to the pool, or "you will eventually have enough money to go a European vacation" and most recently "you will have a job that you love, pays really well, and makes a difference and then you will look back and smile fondly of this challenging job you have now". This voice also knows the future about not so important events like "you will find curtains that you love sometime" and "my organized closet will be the envy of America" and most recently today that voice said to me, "when you are grown you will no longer throw your work clothes on the floor at the end of the day to collect cat hair. They will magically be thrown in the dirty clothes or hung back up for the second appearance". Then Sybil's voices left me and the brief state of sanity and I realized...oh my Lord I am grown and I will probably always throw my clothes in the floor. I look around and am totally shocked at what I saw. It is not like I do not have a habit of cleaning up, oh no I have the exact opposite habit. Down below me are my shoes from the last three days and they are all laying in the exact same location. The brown boots with major heals I wore on Sunday, obviously not to teach in because of the height, brown teacher loafers Monday and black flats from Tuesday. I look in the other direction and brown dress pants are in a certain place on the floor, under those pants are work out pants from the weekend, on my bed are the collection of sleep shirts and on my night stand are a growing collection of empty glasses that previously contained water. The optimistic voice reassuring me of my maturing future grows more and more distant. I begin to seriously worry that I have created this character as a defense mechanism to cope with stress to bring a sunnier future to my problems. Looking at the messy room that resembles the same messy room I prided myself in as an eight year old I decided I had some work to do. Suddenly having a clean room was the as vital as world peace. How was I to achieve greatness with pants in the floor? Only crazies who died way before their time were messy. They were never appreciated during their lifetime and died penniless. Sure, they are often commemorated on coins and calendars, but do they even know that? No. They just know that when they kicked the can people were going to search their apartment for their belongings and say thing such as, "such a brilliant mind, can you believe he lived in such filth? They all have a downfall, oh what could have been". The only justification will be if God is understanding and allows plastic surgery (with out pain, of course) in Heaven so when the others come they will not be able to recognize the messy genius and judge his (or her) disgusting residence.

Perhaps you could say this was a tad bit dramatic. Yeah, perhaps. I've never been consistently neat. It goes on spurts just like personality disorders on such hit tv shows as One Life to Live and of course my favorite, Sybil... but at least I can control them when company is coming over (fake and badly dress company pictured left). Okay, exhaustion has set in. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

Some Rules

I returned to work from the weekend really refreshed and feeling good about being at work. (write this down because it may never happen again) I have a new hair cut, I feel rested, there is only 9 school days until my next PAID vacation, just feeling nice. Then it happened... I had to meet with the insurance people. Last year when I met with these vultures and was almost committed after the stress they induced. But this year I felt confident and walked in and sat down planning on spending the maximum of five minutes with the insurance man. He looks at me and says,"do you like cats?" and I say, "yes I do, I have a kitten named Millie" then he tells me a terrible story about his cat being hit by a car and dying while he was out of town. I politely listen but want to scream I have one break all day when I can go to the bathroom, please hurry it up. So then I guess he assumes (like a lot of Repubs do down here) that every single and white woman is conservative. He pulls out this article with Dave Ramsey and says, "do you know of Dave Ramsey? He says you need disability and I know a smart GIRL like you would do what he says" Okay...okay.. stay calm. I want to look at him and tell him that this GIRL manages to control 150 students raging with hormones and then use my words to cut his soul out make him question life but I stop and say, "no". Of course he is a salesman so he persists and persists..this does not bother me as much because we all have to make a living so I give him some credit but I say "no." Then....he begins talking to me about retirement and the big bad new government. "Obama's gonna take all our money, don't think these bailouts are gonna help any of us. They are gonna have us paying 80% of our income by the time you're in your 40s. They will take all your money away, you better put some more in retirement." With my mouth hanging open and my frown lines blazing he is aware that I am not in agreement with him and looks panicked. I respond with "well oh this mess..yes it is a mess..do you remember how we got in this mess?" he looks at me without anything to say and of course I continue "and furthermore, we do not know each other I would appreciate you not using insulting, untrue comments to scare people into buying your product that you get a commission out of". Don't get me wrong, retirement is important, I have a plan, but this guy just set me off. Finally we moved on and has the nerve to ask me if I want life insurance for MY CAT...I give him a look I only reserve for cheaters and cussers and he takes that as a "no" and finishes my paper work quickly.

So some rules to live by: (that I thought we all knew)

One: Refrain from insulting any politics, religion, etc, especially when you're trying to make some money.

Secondly: Don't be an idiot.

In other news: Goober Sam celebrated his birthday this weekend in Indiana. I am told that he had many friends over and enjoyed presents and fun for his big day! We all wish we could have celebrated with the young chap but I am sure he enjoyed himself in his usual Sam style!

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend, I will publish a weekend update soon! For Natalie's News this has been Natalie-Corinne.

pop quiz

So at the painful hour of 5:15 the alarm hatefully rang and woke me up proving that Spring Break 2009 had officially come to an end and the last 9 weeks of school was upon us. I was happy to be home to see my wild kitty but the wonderful week of sleeping in made it even harder to get up before the sun. I came back to school and the kids were crazier than ever. A week at home with out in school drama gave them too much time to create gossip over texting, facebook, bebo, and other communications devices so the halls were swarming with he said/ she said before 7:20am, way too early for such nonsense. My homeroom was extremely talkative and loud. Maybe it was because I was removed for so long or maybe the students were really too loud but I could not take it so I did what any good teacher does. I gave them a welcome back quiz. I decided I would not stress over making them listen. I went over notes and definitions, gave great examples, took questions from some students while some continued to whisper and pass notes. Finally I said in my best teacher voice, "okay, put everything away and take out a pencil and paper and separate into your test seats". Panic struck the room because this is the last day before grades are printed for report cards and a bad quiz grade can really hurt students! Many students gave me the usual groans, pathetic faces, but one very talkative student named Tyeisha responded loudly, "how you gonna give us a pop quiz on the first day back from spring break?" I looked at her with the most evil teacher smile I could give and responded softly back, "welcome back". Small and precious victory. Now that the students were scared they were quiet which is worth more money that I shall ever know.

In other news, yes spring break is over for good. In my last weekend in the boondocks (aka Arkansas) I went to the Wiederkehr winery in further West Arkansas. The winery is located in Altus, Arkansas where the famous Paris and Nicole began their adventures in The Simple Life. The winery began with a tasting where the t-shirt wearing employees looked less than thrilled to be working. People from far and wide watched the movie Sideways before attending and were proud of their wino questions while the employees irritatedly answered with snobby faces. I guess when one has been working in a winery for a while one may get tired of faux wrangler wearing wino's but I was surprised with the obvious frustration from the employees. Finally it was time for the grand tour of the winery. An employee in a orange Nike T-shirt with matching jogging pants gave the tour and was equally ready to be finished as the other employees. There were surprisingly a lot of folks on the tour and they fell into one of two categories. First were the folks who were really eager to be there so they could learn facts about wine and impress their friends and two the group who read wikipedia before they left and had prepared questions to feel important...well I guess there were three because I fell into the group who thought the whole thing was a sham. I felt badly for the first two groups because the tour provided hardly any knowledge and when anyone asked a question the tour guide belittled them...sad. But on a positive note, the wine and the little restaurant were very good. The restaurant (pictured right) used to be the Wiederhehr home back in the later 1800s and now is a restaurant where the waitresses really dress like the picture! The trip made me think fondly of the long ago trip to Europe with Ray and Lindsay and all of our great experiences...Thank God now I actually have a tolerance and did not serenade anyone on a train ride after a little wine.

Well I best get back to work! I hope everyone has a wonderful week. For Natalie's News this has been Natalie-Corinne.

Happy Birthday Lindsay C

All of us at Natalie's News want to wish Ms. Lindsay of Manhattan a wonderful birthday! Muah!

For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

back in the hood

So after writing the perfect neighborhood I began thinking, even in my wildest dreams I know I could not really receive such a perfect neighborhood. Even if all those famous folks did live next to me, I'm sure they all contain some jaded quirks that come from a life time of stardom. Just think...I bet Anderson Cooper is a total neat freak and has annoying little yuppie dogs that bark constantly. Knowing that nobody..not even the rich and famous could live in nirvana it made me start thinking of the worst neighborhood. Who would be the worst neighbors ever? No fear, I found them.

1. Barbara Walters: Do I even need to explain..okay I will. First of all, drop the accent. I'm not so sure why everyone gave Madonna such a hard time for her 3 year British accent because Barbara has been sporting some sort of accent or speech impediment forever. Wait, aren't you from AMERICA? Second, she thinks she knows all. I can barely watch her on anything. If she is conducting an interview she really tries to make everyone cry by asking the cheesiest questions and wrinkling that little nose. Yet she always talks so much the guest barely speaks. Lastly, no, not everyone loves or even likes you for that matter. But you are like the Don of television so everyone sucks up to you. I'm sure as a neighbor she would expect all of her "subjects" (ie. next store neighbors) to do all her lowly work for free like feed her annoying dogs with out pay while she goes out of town and then I just know she would not invite her neighbors to her big parties because none of us have met any royalty or the Dalia Lama.

2. Alex and Simon from Bravo's The Real Housewives of NYC: If you watch this show at all you know that this couple is the biggest bunch of wanna be's ever in America. They are totally new money folks and that is just fine, if you just own it. If I ever have a ton of money, I will be new money too but I just hope I have enough class to still be me and not try to be some impostor sporting my pink pants and matching pink shoes (yes that was Simon, the husband). These wanna be socialites constantly name drop and ache to climb the social latter while people laugh at them often at their faces. Rarely I have a tender feeling toward them because they seem to have no purpose but then seeing their terribly behaved children with awful and equally contrived names just makes me frustrated all over again. (ps their children's names are Francois and Johann...yeah life at school will be awesome for those kids..I just hope they either get into the theater clique quickly who often accepts odd balls or they are just huge and can destroy anyone..that's their only hope!)

3. Michael Jackson: Oh where to start, this could be a thesis so I'll just list...the kid's name is Blanket, they wear masks, he is insane, he held his baby over a balcony, his fascination with the little boys is disgusting, the insane Asian fans on the street near your house ruining your cook out would be maddening, his chin, his nose...I couldn't handle it.

4. Whitney Houston: Oh, oh Whitney. I used to LOVE old school Whitney when I was young and really looked up to her and one day aspired to be just like bouncy, beautiful Whitney. Boy, that changed. Bobby and the drugs really took that star on a tour of crazy town. We thought Brittney was bad? At least her crazy faze was only a year or so. Whitney has been off the rocker pushing 15 years now. I know she has dumped Bobby but I just know the crack is wack Whitney is bound to make a come back. Soon enough she'll have another religious awakening in some body of water and the media will be there in a heart beat. If she was your neighbor she would probably mistake your pool for the "enlightening water" and decide to devote her life to whoever she can pronounce that day in your back yard. Although this would provide insane stories for the rest of your life, you and I would much rather this happen to a friend and not at your own house.

5. Rush Limbaugh: Rub a dub dub, lets take some pills in this tub and then condemn the rest of the country for being immoral. I know as a neighbor good ol' Rush would be tanked up on one of his "pain pills" and see one of my Obama signs and set my house on fire. Better yet he would get some church to come and stage an intervention on my front lawn. Then once he gets caught again he will be on house arrest and have to do that awful excuse for a radio show from home and then all his guests would have to share the road with you. That is the real reason for the housing crisis.

So you see, no matter where you live it could always be a lot worse. Thank God this imaginary crazy town does not exist....yet. Have a great weekend! For Natalie's News this has been Natalie-Corinne.

in the hood

Deciding to live somewhere is such a gamble. You can find the perfect place and then be stuck in an awful situation after you meet...the neighbors. Who you live by can totally make or break your living situation. I have been blessed to have colorful yet enjoyable neighbors. A couple years back at the Turtle I had crazy frat boy neighbors who always threw the best themed parties. They had 80s night, Halloween parties, famous couple party, Gallagher party, (yes my friend dressed as Gallagher and everyone had to wear trash bags while he smashed fruit...hilarious) and tons more. Recently I am not the biggest fan of my neighbor at the duplex because, they are our landlords and it is required that everyone hate their landlord. Mine told me she would only be there 7 weekends of the entire year which is the biggest lie ever. I guess one of the reasons I get so frustrated is because we are breaking the rules and having pets when we are not supposed to BUT we got the illegal pets with the understanding that there would be little chance of getting caught! How were we supposed to know they would come to Oxford every darn weekend?! Anyway, the entire point to this random rambling is I am considering moving and now I must endure the agony of the new neighbors. This caused me to imagine a perfect world where we could hand pick our neighbors, even if we did not really know them and make a fun and exciting block where we all got along and had major block parties that the other neighborhoods grew jealous of. So finally with out further hesitation I present...my dream neighborhood.

First next door neighbor: Seth Rogen (pictured left). Why? Because every time I look at that man he makes me laugh. I can imagine it now. I'm walking to the bottom of the driveway to get my mail and he meets me in some crazy outfit and starts the day totally laughing and having fun constantly. He would of course throw killer parties where other hilarious stars would attend. We would all become great friends and enjoy vacationing together all over the world.

Second next door neighbor: Ina Garden (from The Food Network's Barefoot Contessa, pictured right) I love, love, love Ina. She is the expert on everything fine, from cheese to vanilla, baked goods to flowers and table cloths, this woman is always ready for a dinner party. She is so classic and is always sharing with her neighbors. On her show is she constantly having over friends and neighbors and of course I would be a delight to have on her show. The wealthy tend to love artsy types and I could totally play up my "torn inner turmoil" about being creative in a practical world. She, Jeffrey and TR would love me.

Across the street neighbor: Anderson Cooper (pictured left). Hello? Why not? First of all he's totally hot but more importantly, we would always know what is going on. I feel like if there were going to be some major incident in the world he would call his loving neighbors first to make sure we were safe. Plus he would give us deals on the great designer clothes he sports in third world countries.

Down the street neighbor: Tim Gunn. If you are obsessed with Bravo's Project Runway you know that our sweet Tim has impeccable style and the best personality. He would be the perfect person to attend any dinner party and I'm sure wouldn't' mind coming over daily to hand pick my outfits to make sure I was always catwalk ready.

Little further down the street neighbor: Whoopi Goldberg. This may sound like an odd choice but for one we need some diversity and two that woman is so crazy she would be so much drama and fun to live on the same street with. I wouldn't want to live right beside her because I would be victim to some of her animal mishaps yet she would provide great fun or gossip at our pool parties with the other neighbors.

There are more and more people I would love to have on this imaginary block. But now I'm going to go live my real life. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. For Natalie's News this has been Natalie-Corinne.

spring break recap

I blinked and it is already Friday of Spring Break. Where did all this time go? I shall try to recap. After the fun trip to Atlanta we went back to Nashville for a couple of days with the family. While in Nashville mother Michelle and I went on one of our epic shopping trips and visited almost every Target in the middle Tennessee area to find certain dishes. We are known for our day long shopping adventures that always begin with the goal of a short trip to the mall and always end up with a day long adventure that brings us to do crazy things such as go to the Old Town Pottery Outlet with a uhaul attached to the car that neither of us can turn properly. No stops with a uhaul on this trip but shopping was no less adventurous and successful. After Nashville I made a tour on Highway 40 West to Arkansas. I must say I have underestimated West Arkansas. Forever I thought (like most do) that the entire state of Arkansas was filled with toothless Republicans who would try to get me to join their Baptist church. But I have been mistaken. Although this city is aching with out the presence of milk (who knew there were still dry places?!...hello Prohibition is over and who ya kidding.. give that tax money to some schools! Arkansas is the lowest in education by mistake!) surrounding areas are not half bad. In Arkansas I have experienced such excitement such as: sleeping until 8am, riding an exercise bike during the middle of the day while watching the View, buying oranges off the side of the road, and wait for it wait for it, driving around the square and going to antique stores. Although the average pace of this place is around 15mph it is a nice break from the craziness that is my life. I can tell that I am starting to get a little stir crazy though. I have not felt bored but I noticed that I was creating little projects. For example, yesterday I was determined to have fiesta night. I went to dollar tree and bought fun cactus margarita glasses, little pin wheels and lanterns for decorations. I bought tons of ingredients to make my Mexican fiesta. It was really fun but I realized that another week of this and I would be going a little crazy. There is hope though. Today I traveled to another town that I really liked and later we are going to a winery (where I will steal as much wine as possible). Apparently there are a lot of wineries in Arkansas..who knew? Maybe this little oasis of a winery will be the Napa valley of the south. We shall see.

In other news, Papa Pete and Mother Michelle had a wonderful night at the Blue Bird Cafe in Nashville last night for Pete's 39th Birthday. Although there was a slight problem at the Blue Bird. The family ordered beer (of course) and the waitress neglected to bring a glass. What? When did beer drinking become so looked down upon? Are we not human? Bring a glass? Who wants to drink out of a bottle that's all wet and and creates drinking wrinkles around the mouth? Treat us like humans and bring a beer glass. This is Natalie and I approve this message.

Well I am off for lunch to meet some new Arkansas folks. As I look over the above blog I'm disturbed with the amount of "milk" references. More subjects in the future, I promise! I hope everyone has a wonderful start to the weekend! For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

Happy Birthday Pop!

Happy Birthday Dad!

Today is my Poppa Pete's Birthday! He is celebrating at home with wife Michelle and enjoying his day! This morning Michelle cooked him a great breakfast and tonight they are going to a concert that was Michelle's present to Pete. Make sure you take time and wish my wonderful dad a happy birthday. He deserves the very best and I'm sure they will have a great time tonight!

For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

overwhelmed update

Since this week begins Spring Break I promise I will take time to update the blog. Seriously life has been pretty insane and I will give a quick update.. and a longer one soon.

March 2nd: Close friend calls of wedding. Help address 1000 envelopes canceling the wedding. She is doing remarkably well and I am super proud off her!

March 3: turned 26. Lets not talk about it. No, seriously, I got to celebrate so many times. It was really wonderful.

March 5: Wallet is stolen at school. Another long, long story... and no I have not found it. Mom comes into town and we go out with friends to Thacker Mountain Radio show and then to dinner and drinks. All on Mom of course, no wallet = no money.

March 6: Finally perform black history program at school. We have worked on this for so long and if you read the previous blog you know of just some of the drama. I have found costumes, sound equipment, dance moves etc for this production. All goes well except for two renegade eighth graders who decide to get early experience on their future stripper careers by provocatively dancing with out permission in front of my bosses, student body, and mother. Other students cried and were accompanied by angry mothers. Another angry student yelled at me again in front of Mom and finally after me yelling several time to get out of my room she ended the episode with a hand in the face and a stern "holla". Mom leaves quickly because I have to take care of major middle school drama and she is close to hitting rude girl yelling at her daughter and I do not make enough bank as a teacher to provide bail money.

March 8: Children's choir sings at church and I attend two services and get ready for the dreaded Monday that will be filled with conferences about the "incident" on Friday.

March 9: Actually not too bad. All the kids are talking about the incident and I am happy to report they did not think the girls were cool rather trashy. Small success.

March 10: Am called into the office I think to talk about the "incident". No. Some kid told his parent I called him gay. WHAT? I love the gays. I would never use that as an insult. I want to divulge my love for... Prada, hair gel, hot abs, Kathy Griffin, show tunes, the Episcopal church and everything else I share with the stereotypical gay population. But my I am not so sure how my conservative boss will take this confession and just tell the truth. I have never or will never use that as an insult. There must be some misunderstanding. He believes me, all is okay, for now.

March 11: Completely out of money. I go to the bank during my planning period and beg for them to let me withdraw with out a drivers licence. I cannot get a drivers license until I get cash. The only form of ID I have is my school ID and the nice ladies let me get money.

March 12: Auditions for the American Idoleque competition I am presenting begin at school. Meryl Streep should retire in awe of my amazing acting abilities. Keeping a supportive face during the many renditions of Beyonce and Alicia Keys catastrophes is flawless.

March 13: Almost as good as Christmas... it's Friday and Spring Break is almost here! I just keep counting down the hours until I do not have to see junior high kids until the 23rd. Praise God. Right after school I drive to Nashville.. all the way in the rain.

March 14: No sleep for the weary. We're up bright and early and off to Atlanta to stay with uncle Ray and see Ben. We drive in basically a tsunami to Atlanta and of course the game is rained out. This is actually awesome because we get to see brother Ben all day long and celebrate my birthday one more time!

Now we're here in Atlanta. Ray made an amazing cake and we just ate dinner and took Ben back to his hotel that he is required to stay at with his team. We all feel like collapsing and I think that will occur all too soon. More this week during spring break 09. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.