Jersey girl

So I have a little confession to make, maybe it's all the Bravo (Real Housewives of New Jersey pictured right, don't have real favorites yet...but the comment" she wants to skin me and wear me like last season's Versace" was PRICELESS) I've been watching but I secretly wish I had a New Jersey or Long Island accent. I know, I'm totally insane, but I really want one of those " don't mess with me because everything I do and say sounds dramatic because of my accent" voices. Something about their voices is glamorous to me, but not in a Hollywood kind of glamorous, think gangster (pictured left). I know this may sound offensive to some, but I kind of wish I was in some safe way connected to the mafia. Waste management, jewelry falling of trucks, the food etc is so foreign and exciting to me, and the accent makes it even better. If I had the accent I could say "oh my gawd" in that nasally tone and wave my big curly hair, perfectly manicured long nails, and tanned body in any one's face that was giving me some trouble and they would have tremble in fear. Unfortunately, I do not have a good Jersey girl accent and although secretly I try to create one my southern roots shine and I sound too nice. Not always a bad thing, but it would be nice to be able to turn on and off my Jersey girl alter ego when in need. Think of her is a my Jersey super hero named Nikki Randalfalo (pictured right) who combats haters with all the Jersey girl traits folks love to hate. Nice.

Well I am off to finish up the last official day of school! I'm jetting off to Nashville for the long weekend and am so excited to spend it with the whole family! I wish everyone a wonderful weekend, for Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

oath

Repeat after me: I Natalie do solemnly swear to never and I repeat never buy another celebrity magazine ever, ever again. Amen. Today I lost control and bought People and last week I bought US weekly. What is wrong with me? It's not like I need reminding that one we're in a recession and two I seriously do not even read when I buy this rag mags. I flip carelessly with out reading and look at the pictures with less brain function than a four year old. Sadly, I've already seen these pictures on television or even more appalling while reading CNN.com everyday. They are so sneaky though, those blasted headlines. John and Kate plus 8 did it for me this time. This morning my friend and carpool companion Jessica and I stopped because she needed something from Piggly Wiggly and I walked several times by the magazines and showed adult restraint. Come on Natalie, you don't really NEED this magazine just walk away, and then like a child I thought, "oh what's a couple of bucks" it ended up being 4+ dollars and I was finished in less than five minutes. Such a waste. If Dave Ramsey (crazy man pictured right) was my friend (bwahaha) he would be so disappointed. But I oddly really wanted to see what Kate from John and Kate had to say about the rocky marriage. Why? A great question a therapist probably should answer. I don't even know these people and rarely watch their show. I am a tad bit jealous of how adorable their children are but then I realize I don't even want one baby and 8 would for sure send me to padded walls. Although on the show she is ummm a bit over the top at times, bless her heart (random southern fact.. you can say ANYTHING and I mean anything mean or gossipy about someone as long as you end it with one of the following phrases, "bless her heart" or "God love her", then all is forgiven. The comment sounds sweet but it is really mean, it's one of the longest running southern secrets. For example, look at the girls gossiping below the one talking is saying,"Good Lord she's gotten fatter than a hog, God love her" put a little sweet southern (NOT REDNECK!!) drawl in there and you're golden) but she does have all those children and it is disappointing when any one's marriage or relationship is on the rocks. So, the cover of her sitting sadly all alone with the even more dramatic headline of "We might split up" was too hard for me to avoid and I took the bait and bought the rag. But no more!! As blogger as my witness I was save my pennies and no longer buy such ridiculous reading materials and spend it on more adult items such as curtains that I still do not own. (Yeah the blanket that the boyfriend put up as a joke is still hanging in there...I now tell visitors that it's a statement on living the green life and reusing what one already has but that's total bull, I just can't find curtains I like).

Well that's all for now, I hope everyone has a wonderful hump day! Thanks for reading, for Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

Jack, I need more time!

Last night pandemonium, outrage and tragedy struck Oxford. This was a tragedy nobody not even all the folks at Natalie's News could see coming...(look even Britt is upset, pictured right) my dvr malfunctioned. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! I know, I know. President Obama is flying in as we speak, my duplex is expected to be called a state of emergency and I should receive some stimulus funds but none of this comforts the fact that I was unable to watch the finale of Jack Bauer's heroism in 24 (insert tick tock tick tock tick tock). Say what you must about 24, the unbelievable plot lines, the political undertones, the fact that Keifer Sutherland (pictured left) is constantly in and out of jail and I believe has taken method acting to a new level and really believes he is Jack Bauer, the show has got me by the jaw and I am totally hooked. It is somewhat embarrassing to love this republican show (but props to the female president, whoop, pictured down left, please don't get confused with the whaling Britt) but maybe it's my bipartisan heart calling out that keeps me tuning in every Monday. Back in the olden days before I had a dvr (s-t-r-u-g-g-l-i-n-g) I would leave sorority chapter early if we were not done to get home before 24. Leaving sorority chapter meetings you ask? Yeah, really important stuff was going on too, like how to cure world hunger, cancer and what color shirts to wear for sigma chi derby days and how to lose a quick 10lbs before formal. (don't even deny it girls, you know it's true). Anyway, back to the point, the dvr malfunctioned and right in this critical part about 30 minutes in where the bad guys have Jack's daughter at the airport the sound goes out. It was totally a Sopranos finale kind of feeling. You're there right in the middle of a tense moment knowing something vital to the story is coming and BAM no more sound! I was so upset. Dish network essentially destroyed my life and I will always remember this when choosing my new tv/Internet provider. Recession proof? I think not dish network!

I hope everyone else has better luck with their dvrs. Life shouldn't be this hard. For Natalie's News this is a very 24 finale free, Natalie-Corinne.

end of an era

This is the last week of school at the junior high. Sweet little students arrive bringing goodies and saying their precious good byes to their friends and teachers for the long summer where I guess they will never see each other again. It all seems so dramatic to me. Students feel they should tell everyone how amazing and gucci they are and how they will never be forgotten over the long two months of summer. Was I this dramatic? But more importantly, why is nobody but me excited? I want to literally run up and down the halls naked while doing cartwheels sharing the good news that is summer. Don't you get that this is over? For two glorious months we won't have to wake up before the sun, lunch will be longer than 18 minutes, and I will be able to go to the bathroom any old time I want! What more could a girl want?! Maybe some of them will miss the drama of this circus, but I am looking forward to the relaxing and blazing hot summer that awaits us. ahhh.

In other news, brother Ben is home from college and of course being waited on hand and foot by the parents. He enjoyed a large dinner of ribs last night, prepared by Papa Pete, and I am told the parents chewed the food up for him so he would have to as little work as possible. Seriously, Ben had a very tough semester and did very well in grades and athletics and we are very happy to have the young chap home where he is required to bathe and shave.

Lastly, I do apologize to my loyal readers (thanks family) for the absence of this vital article...the recap of possibly the most important reality show finale ever...I give you the two-night finale of The Real Housewives of New York City (pictured right). Oh where to start. I can't help it, I love these girls. Jill Zarin is my favorite. She is the Jewish neighbor I've always wanted and never had. She is so fun and out there and I really love her, coming in a close second is Bethenny. We could definitely be friends and maybe I would lose a couple drinking her skinny girl margaritas. The rest can fight for the most repulsive depending on what episode you're watching. Anyway the two night finale was priceless including uncanny amounts of fake tears, the countess getting down and dirty, models being accused of assault, gay husbands, ill behaved children, the list goes on and on. Love it. If you have not filled your obligation of guilty television viewing, now is the time. I cannot wait for next season with the real housewives of New Jersey. The wives have huge hair, houses, tans, jewelry, boobs, everything one would expect from a Jersey girl. Even better, most of them are related and have the "family business"! Ahh, could you get more mob-esque?!?! Set your dvrs now and thank me later.

Well I hope everyone has a great beginning to their week. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

tell me

Since most of my adult life has been spent thus far succeeding as a professional student, I have been lucky enough to be surrounded by fellow professional students of varying ages ,professional students are seriously eccentric and live life according to their own set of rules. What's the problem? Well, there really isn't a problem if one continues to live in the professional student atmosphere for the rest of one's life but if you step outside the bubble of academia and enter the real world one might discover some habits that are not most "adult friendly". During my first year of being a real adult I've noticed that other real adult do not share some of my habits and currently I'm wondering if these traits are what make me "unique" or some bad habits that I should ditch on my voyage to adulthood.

For example...

1. When is one too old to eat only item or even worse, one food item for dinner? When should I begin to look down on my habit of eating cereal, half a can of re-fried beans, frozen yogurt, laffy taffys or tootsie rolls for dinner? I mean, I never feel like cooking but I am beginning to hear people swapping recipes, describing successful dinners, and table scape ideas and I believe I'm missing the boat on some adult right of passage. Should there really be something green in every meal? My college ways of eating seem so 2006 and I should probably get on with the rest of my age demographic...or then again I could start lying about my age now to delay any future aging. Done.

2. When should one get rid of early twenties household decorations? Martini and margarita glasses, pink fuzzy sorority picture frames, bright plastic glasses from Target, and countless Eiffel towers are fabulous for the young twenty somethings first apartment, but when should the mature mid-twenty year old rid themselves of these cute yet cheap purchases? As I visit my adult friend's houses I see actual homes filled with household decorations from fancy places such as pottery barn or williams and sonoma. These items scream that one has not had children and therefore have disposable income to spend on expensive remade shabby chic antiques. I yet to own such items and feel like I have not been admitted to the adults only club (not the dirty kind).

3. Do I really have to have a garden? When I was in middle school I locked myself out of the house and knowing I would get in trouble for being irresponsible, I thought I would pull weeds so my mom would be too distracted by the gracious acts of her perfect daughter to notice that she forgot her key for the 4,000th time. But did I pull weeds? No, I pulled beautiful lilies I think, lots of them. If there really are colors for thumbs in the garden I imagine mine is the color of death and not remotely any shade of green.

4. When should one stop cussing? I think is probably when one decides to have kids but honestly since I started teaching I've cussed more than I ever have before in my life. Some profanity used to make my conscience hurt but now the s-word is just like saying the words "cup" or "light". Nothing...nadda. Is this very adult like?

5. Is it okay to still listen to pop music? As a "serious" musician this is a major fault. I blame my love of pop music on my uncle Ray and his major influence as a young child. We would jam out to Madonna, Cher, Janet, Whitney, all the requirements for a well-rounded pop education. I studied Mozart, Puccini, Brahms, etc for so long and so many of my friends ride around jamming out to these old timers in their cars. Don't get me wrong, I love so opera but you better believe when I'm in my car alone I'm blasting so totally inappropriate pop music that thrives on using incorrect grammar.

Maybe I'm on the short bus to adulthood or maybe I've found the fountain of youth, who knows. If anyone wants to write a book about the correct steps, I would probably read it. Well read the first couple of chapters but if it wasn't funny I would totally donate it to the books for inmates at St. Peter's. Not playing.

Well I hope everyone has a wonderful adult-like day. Whatever that means. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

bad Natalie bad

test update... Day one of the most pointless waste of time since Rock of Love with Brett Michaels, we started late and it took forever but that is not the real story. We DID have auditors and no not the children got in trouble but terrible teacher Natalie did!!!! As previously posted we cannot sit or anything and after two hours of absolute silence I got so bored. There was only one student still taking the test so I opened a year book because I honestly do not know all the teachers who work here. Well..big mistake. At that moment the auditor walked in and I'm standing looking at the year book. Damn. Nothing happened but I am sitting in fear waiting for the big bad principals to come and scold me for my terrible actions. If you do not hear from me again I love you all and I want a montage of Julie Andrews at my funeral. UGHGHGHGHG.

That's all for now. For Natalie's News this has been a very rule breaking, Natalie-Corinne.

failing kidneys

Unfortunately I will not have much time to blog this week due to the big, bag STANDARDIZED TEST...(insert scary music here). After a year of preparing, cramming, odd pep rallies, and bribing the day is finally here and every administrator across the state is praying their chaps will buck up and do and score proficient or better in every subject. Everyone is very concerned because we will probably have state auditors come by and scrutinize every move we unfit teachers make. Our laundry lists of "don'ts" for teachers consists of: NO cell phones, no sitting, no leaning against the wall, not standing in one spot for too long, no talking, no helping, no comfortable clothes, no bathroom breaks...but it's all good b/c we almost get paid minimum wage. What does this have to do with Natalie's News? Because the test begins in the morning, I do not get a planning period (awesome) and have no time to plan etc so I will have to do more work at home and I'm afraid the blog might fall by the waste side. But in the spirit of funny woman Wanda Sykes, maybe Rush Limbaugh's kidneys will be fine and mine will fail so I will get to on a mini vacation in the hospital and won't have to proctor the test. Sounds like a fail safe plan to me. (disclaimer, please do not be offended if you or a loved one has failing kidneys)

Well I have to go and be a PROCTOR. Uhh, old. I wish everyone a kidney failing free day. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

My momma

Today is one of the most important days of the year, Mother's Day! I truly believe mothers have the hardest job in the entire world and there should be a day at least once a month celebrating their hard work, but if one day is all they get, we should go big or go home. Unfortunately, I am unable to be with my momma (Mom and kids pictured right) today because of work commitments in Oxford, but she and the pop traveled to Martin to see Brother Ben play and then stay for the senior appreciation/family picnic. Trying to describe what all a mother does is as complicated as describing the logic behind Rachael Ray's wardrobe. Nobody understands how or what all they do in a day, but all I know is that my mom magically is the first one up getting every one's day started off to a wonderful start and the last one to go to bed making sure everyone is taking care of (not counting if pop stays up later working on fantasy). She is always caring, really funny (just ask her) and apparently in possession of a magical serum that allows her to know answers and solutions to most problems. Whenever I'm in the middle of a breakdown my supermom always comes to the rescue with a plan to conquer and it always works even if I don't always want to admit it. As I write I am trying to come up with the right way to describe a good mom but it really is difficult to come up with the words... so maybe some stories will do. I don't know what it is about my mom, me and trips but we always seem to be going somewhere insane together. Case and point, two summers ago uncle Ray graciously gave me his old furniture (that w/o there would be NO places to sit in my house btw) but we had to make the trip to Atlanta to get the furniture. There was a couch, over sized chair, two coffee tables, bed, dresser, bed side table and a desk. OMG. Mom got off work at around 8, got a Uhaul and drove to Atlanta by herself. Arriving late and struggling to park we alarmed all of Ray's neighbors and proved their loyalty by calling him even later in the night while on vacation to alert him of some crazy Tennesseans coming to steal him out of house and home. The next morning we began unloading all of the furniture outside and quickly realized the uhaul was not big enough. After loading everything we could, Mom drove me back to Oxford (6 hours from Atlanta) and then back to Nashville (almost 5 hours) with the Uhaul, only to do it again the very next weekend! When I was young she drove me to dance lessons, softball (who was I kidding) girl scouts, violin lessons, pool parties, basketball and as I got older she drove me to every mall in the middle Tennessee area to find dresses for dances (of course I always looked fat), voice lessons, auditions for undergraduate schools, move in day at Ole Miss, choir concert, football games, recitals, finally graduate school auditions and countless other trips. I really could not imagine a pair of more supportive parents and a mother who thank God has some sense of direction. From all of our mother/daughter trips I've learned...you should stop for gas before you are on empty, throw away your trash throughout the trip to prevent a junky car, even if you you are going the speed limit you might be going too fast for the situation, have a plan to tell the officer before you get pulled over, good music is a necessity for a successful road trip and finally going anywhere with my mom will be an experience to cherish! If I turn out to be half of the momma she has been I will be proud.

I hope my mom and every other mom out there has the BEST Mother's Day ever; you deserve it! For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

humiliation at its finest

As everyone knows standardized tests have become the main focus of American public education. Some try to deny this fact but just admit it. Doing well on the test has become the ultimate deal of all schools and administrators will do just about anything to get students motivated to do well on the test... now enter humiliation. Due to pressure from previous test scores, my school is under the gun to produce passing test scores so the administration is planning a standardized test pep rally. Yeah, I'm serious. We're supposed to cheer and get excited like we would for our football team but this time they are no cheerleaders and pep band, rather a week of filling in tiny bubbles that the students are supposed to get excited about. They have planned lots of little games and races to get the students involved and even better the teachers! A little birdie told me that there will be a hula hoop competition and yours truly will be involved. Awesome. Back in the day I was quite the expert hula hooper but that was circa 1992. Life and my hips have changed quite about since then and I am afraid I will be the laughing stock of the school when my hula hoop goes strait to the floor. I thought about racing to Wal Mart during my planning period, buying a hula hoop and practicing but then I remembered that I was a grown up and a competition at a junior high pep rally for standardized tests is as important as who wins the celebrity apprentice (yes...it is STILL on..what is going on NBC?) . Now my plan is to just go with it and try to wow them with my charm rather my actual "skills". I think I will try to twirl it on my arm and neck and if that doesn't work I'll just jump threw it a bunch of times and look like a psycho for some laughs. Usually works with the hormonal crowd. Or even better, I think my friend to the left has the best idea. Nobody would care what I was doing with the hula hoop if I was wearing that...well possibly my bosses or would be known as ex bosses might have a little something to say about it. Oh well, wish me luck. Best case scenario: I get hurt with the hula hoop and get to claim worker's comp for the rest of the year. Just kidding...well not really kidding at all.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Friday. For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

there she is

So this is super shallow but I'm not gonna lie, I love a good beauty pageant controversy. Nothing gets me going better than a faux purity princess that lives a double life, ahh what drama! Not even the folks at lifetime could make this stuff up. Of course I'm talking about Ms. California 2009, Carrie Prejean (pictured right). First of all she is gorgeous with a rocking bod, beautiful hair and an engaging smile, so we are required to stare at the beauty and unfairly the world waits for her to mess up. Oh and mess up she has. After the USA pageant I was confused and sympathetic. First I was confused why the Miss USA pageant was still on the air. Who watches this?! After the blunder with Tara Conner's( pictured left) drug controversy (remember.. small town girl from KY came to the big apple and engaged in unlady like activities and the Donald gave her a second chance and that started the famous Rosie/Donald feud) a couple of years ago, I thought the pageant lost the twinge of validity it had. Secondly I slightly sympathized with the beauty queen because she merely told the truth instead of being PC and everyone was so outraged. Perez Hilton was so rude on his blog and it seemed some people were just rootless about her views. Although I do not agree with Ms. California, this is America and she is free to express herself. But then media went nuts and she became Sarah Palin (Palin pictured as a former beauty queen right) in training and I vomited in my mouth a little bit. Folks everywhere praised her and she became the hot conservative, possible of everything, even saving the Republican party. Finally a new face of the elephants was someone young, hot and conservative. I heard folks praising the beauty queen even speculating that she could be the first woman president, but uh oh, one problem. Thedirty.com has uncovered some old scandalous photos showing the moral wonder in some less than holy photographs. The pictures have been everywhere and so once again another media blitz has surrounded the conservative princess. As a responsible journalist (bwahaha) I googled the pictures and they are racy for a "role model" but you can't see anything more than one could in a Victoria's Secret catalog. Only problem, a couple of days ago she swore to TMZ (who check and recheck their facts) that she regretting taking the one photograph and there were no more. Ah, guess she forgot that there are. The sneaky folks at thedirty found another photograph and Nik Ritchie, operator of thedirty promised to slowly roll out all of his incriminating pictures of the beauty queen. Yikes. What can we learn from all this?! Don't take naked pictures, duh. So many other beauty contestants have suffered the same fate from Internet plunders. Remember Miss New Jersey 2008, Amy Polumbo (pictured left)? Her facebook pictures were not set to private and unflattering pictures of her partying got her in big trouble and she ended up defending her crown to Matt Lauer on the Today Show. Ladies, ladies, ladies, do what my Sunday school teacher in 9th grade told us and keep an aspirin between your legs and smile with those crest white smiles...nothing else.


In other news, my big sis Aimee of Houston gave birth to her new bundle of joy Benny yesterday. Both her and the baby are said to be doing well. This brings me to my next chapter in the quarter life crisis. Holy Lord God people my age are having babies. No longer are "parents" the people that birthed my generation, no they ARE my generation. I suspect in the next couple of years some of my friends will ask to bring their children to our social events...omg. Conversations are going to begin centering around the varying colors of poop and snot of their precious children. If any of my friends are parents like Simon and Alex (pictured right) on New York's housewives I will probably up my dosage of lexi to deal with the Francoises and Johannes of the world. I'm not trying to say I'm against children, just against many children being in my presence for extended periods of time. No, I think having little chaps around will be fun at times, I've just still got to have my social outings sans children some of the time.

Well I should go back to work. I hope everyone has a wonderful day... and remember no nudi pics :) For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

you want me to do what?

As my first school year as a real adult comes to a close I cannot get over how fast everything has gone by. True, some days and weeks, and at times months felt like they were just inching by, for the most part I feel like everything is always in a blur! Days go by too fast and all the sudden it is the end of the year. I cannot believe it has almost been a year since my graduation! Where did it go?! Well, a year older, employed and hopefully wiser I expect I have learned a couple of things and I thought I would share these vital aspects of life. Wish I knew them sooner.

1. Starting a tab at a bar is never a good idea. Sure, nobody carries cash but after a few you start feeling breezy and carefree... like oh I'll just be super generous and buy my friends' a drink. No, this is a recession. Let each buy their own cheap beer and save your pennies.

2. Kids are dirty. They really are. All the time I find gum, paper, candy wrappers, HAIR, etc. on my floor. Oh and to make matters worse, I get some of them after gym so they stink BAD. What to do? Finish class early and make kids clean up everyday and hold them until the room is super clean. You're welcome Mom.

3. Keep yo mouth shut. Nobody likes a gossip. Correction, everyone loves to hear gossip but nobody likes "the" gossip when they are all out in the open. If you're going to gossip only do it to a certain few trusted souls. Impressions are tough to change and I definitely know who are the "gossips" at my work and have attempted to stay far away.

4. Some folks just want to see you upset...and you should look as pleasant as possible in front of them. Earlier in the year I had this spat with a teacher and at first I was all upset and even cried! She went out of her way to give me glares, not speak, send hateful e-mails etc. Finally when I woke up to reality and realized I did not care what this hag thought.. I changed my plan completely! What did I do? Walked with a little extra bounce in my step. Smiled and laughed as much as I could with out looking psycho and made wild with jealousy over my fabulous life and her sad self. Sucka..

5. Not everyone watches The Office and "that's what she said" is not the appropriate joke in all situations. Tragically not everyone understands the humor of Michael Scott and cannot pick up on The Office reference if you throw in a "that's what she said" at an office meeting.

6. If you make that face it WILL stick that way. Start using a moisturizer TODAY. Sadly I did not start doing this until well...a couple of weeks ago. I heard it's the best way to keep looking young so of course I have begun bathing with this regularly.

7. Wine has calories. I know I was shocked too. It actually has a lot depending on the kind. There are types that are better than others so do your homework. I wouldn't advise quitting wine though. It's definitely the only alcohol that is acceptable to drink in excess and the general public will perceive you as dignified rather than drunk.

8. Set your facebook privacy settings to private. Facebook, myspace, twitter, etc has made the world even smaller. We know know what folks are doing every minute of the day via their facebook cell phone status updates. Call me old fashioned but I don't want everyone to know what I'm doing every minute of the day because frankly I don't know what I'm doing all the time. Plus, whatever you put online someone will see. That means co-workers, future employers, etc can see your pictures of a crazy night out or will see your application on how great of a lover you are...yuck.

9. Lexapro = life saver. Can we get it put in the water? Those little pills are pretty much gold in a chalky pill form. I used to be a little "anti-medicine" then I woke up from my tree hugging hibernation and realized that pills are awesome and as long as I don't begin growing leaves or extra ears, I'm okay with it.

10. The sun really does come out tomorrow. Of course I had to throw a musical reference in here! Annie was so ahead of her time and captured my outlook on life. Things always seem the worst right then, but it will get better. If Brittney, Whitney, New Kids on the Block, Janice Dickinson, Kathy Gifford, Miss South Caroline from a couple of years ago, Paula Abdul and tons of other stars can have come back after come back so can we :)

I hope everyone has a great day, for Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.

haters

With such a beautiful and fashion conscience first lady it is to be expected that certain fashionistas are going to talk over her wardrobe choices. Although I think she chooses flawless outfits, others disagree and that is their (wrong) opinion. One thing I cannot understand is the fascination over her... arms....yeah her arms. First of all, the arms are fierce. For example, take all the recent hype about her official portrait, featured to the right. I think she looks totally classic, I mean she is even wearing pearls. It's a basic black dress by Michael Kors, totally an American classic. I heard criticism recently about this portrait not "looking American". What do you want? A frumpy picture with the first lady sporting mom jeans and a t-shirt with assorted fruits and flowers?! I also heard critics talking about her curves...umm hello, she is a woman! Apparently some people in the media need to return to junior high biology and learn the different anatomy traits between males and females. Perhaps it would help with bipartisan relations. Oh and back to my original point...those limbs projecting from either side of her shoulders...they're called arms folks and hers happen to be hot. If I had the first lady's arms I would never wear sleeves. Tim Gunn would question my decision to wear a sleeveless shirt on a goodwill mission to Siberia and I would have to answer, "I leave my toned and amazing arms exposed for the the will of the world...cold weather cannot tame my spirits". Pictured to the left is the first couple in their first black tie affair at the white house! I love how glamorous she looks and once again..she's sporting those rocking arms and for some reason that alarms people! Honestly I think a lot of people are jealous of the hot first lady. Not only is she smart, seems like a good Momma, but she is beautiful and just happens to be married to the President of the United States. Yeah, she's got some haters, but all beautiful people do. No worries, Michelle, we all get used to it. Listen, life is too short, don't hate..appreciate!

In other news, thank God almighty, we have air conditioning. We have finally reconnected with civilized society and have air conditioning. It could not have come any earlier I might add. I was seriously considering breaking into Scruggs and sleeping on the coach in the front office like the good old days of grad school. But, thankfully it did not come to that level of desperation. Last night curling up in my bed (once again, thanks Ray!) was one of the most joyous occasions EVER! Life is once again good. (To the right is a simulation of my response to the return of air if I were living in a beautiful cobble stone street in Europe).

Well I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend:) For Natalie's News this has been, Natalie-Corinne.